Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
