He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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