Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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