You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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