we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
