i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
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