I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
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She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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