dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
