no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
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