You really coming over, don't trick.
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
