it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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