we're blogging at a bar
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize
