Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
It's official drugs can't kill me
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Randomize
