i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Randomize
