It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize
