Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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