Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize