Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
