Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
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she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
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I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize