i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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