EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
operation harelip BJ is a go
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
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