good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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