Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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