She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
they need to just BURY HIM!
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
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drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
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I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
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