so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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