I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Shame - the story of my life.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
