It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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