And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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