Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
