it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Life without a bra equals bliss.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
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