I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
