This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
