I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
