I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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