gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
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