he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
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Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
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I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
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