i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize