Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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