just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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