the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
