Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
