Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
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