How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Randomize
