Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
