ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
