my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize