that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Randomize
