Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize