She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
