I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
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i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
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Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
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