it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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